Welcome to our exclusive “Social Media” page. Here at Waterfall 2024, we’ve boldly chosen to embrace the avant-garde notion that social media might just be a passing fad. In our commitment to nostalgia and simpler times, we’ve decided that the best way to handle social media is to not handle it at all!
Why waste time scrolling endlessly when you can stare blissfully at a wall of Gantt charts? Why tweet, when you can write a thorough memo? Why connect virtually when you can miss out on networking in person due to strictly scheduled coffee breaks? Here, we take a stand against the fleeting gratifications of digital likes and shares, and instead, offer a chance to appreciate the enduring satisfaction of offline interactions.
So, instead of directing you to Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram, we invite you to disconnect. Unplug your router, power down your smartphone, and enjoy a refreshing break from the incessant pings of notifications. If you feel the urge to share something, write it down in a letter, put a stamp on it, and mail it to someone who also appreciates the lost art of letter writing.
In the unlikely event that you believe social media is essential, we encourage you to reconsider. Perhaps, deep down, you’re just yearning for the days when software took three years to update and phones were attached to walls. Embrace the freedom of being unfindable, untaggable, and unhashtagable. Welcome to a world without social media — because, really, did it ever truly exist?